The first few days after Daniel's passing were horrible for me, I had one prayer that this time I would be assured I would see him again. I have lost other dogs and pets but Daniel was very special, we were joined at the heart and it was like a two way connection.
I prayed to God that just once somehow I would be blessed with something that would reassure me that Daniel was not lost forever and that he was okay. I think my prayers were answered in a very unusual way and this is how it went.
I collected the many dog toys from the yard that Daniel had and I took them downstairs to wash them. The next day I noted on the sidewalk in my fenced in yard there was one just laying right in my path. I decided I would come back and get that one later and take it and wash it.
The third day at night I went out to the barn to throw hay to the horses, there were kittens running around as usual and I wasn't looking down when I walked in. On the way back up the row of stalls I was heading back to feed the barn cats and I was looking down, right in the middle of the aisle way was Daniels toy. It had traveled from just outside the patio doors through the yard, a gate and down the driveway.
I never take the dogs to the barn, I never take dog toys to the barn and cats don't carry dog toys. I thought my brother might have brought it to the barn so I went in the house and woke him up, the answer was no. There had never been a dog toy in the barn period.
The day that Daniel passed I collapsed on the couch with my other dogs and screamed and cried, I wanted to die and I wanted to be where Daniel was at too, my prayer was very serious and I meant it. The only thing other than asking God to take me to and then realizing I had all of my other animals that needed me to was to ask God for one special thing.
My spiritual friend and I mean a powerful person in prayer text me a prayer later that evening, she never knows what or how the prayer will go till she begins to write it and I cried when I read it. My friend had almost word for word prayed for what I had ask God for. So we waited and what came was the mysterious dog toy.
At first I did not believe it was what I thought it was and I was emotionally numb by the third day but over the next few days I allowed myself to be comforted by the strange thing that had happened.
I miss Daniel so and I know I will never not miss him, I am so deeply connected to him and his loving heart but I am able to cope with it now. I will never have another Golden Retriever, I could not bare it but another puppy was soon in my future.
My other 2 dogs are getting old and I have always wanted a female Sheltie. During the week of Thanksgiving I happened to jump on my computer early one morning and as soon as my facebook page loaded there was a picture of a large litter of Shelties at a rescue, all females. I fought the urge because I didn't think now was a good time and spring would be better but Sheltie puppies at a rescue is rare. I talked myself into at least going and looking, it was a two hour drive.
I walked into the room with the puppies and suddenly became engulfed in puppy love and just plain puppiness. I sat down and watched each one, they tackled me with kisses. The smallest one however took her time and slowly approached me after a minute or so and licked my hand. My daughter picked her up and held her and she was quiet and looked around thoughtfully.
She was the smallest and I took her home. Her name is Elsa, she is very good and also now full of life and although she is sweet she is much more bold. The cat Mia who was almost dead when my daughter dropped her off in my barn and I nursed her back to life is Elsa's partner in crime and they run and play.
My Micah who has always been overbearing and grumpy is now the number one puppy babysitter, after about a week he came around to playing with her. Cooper my old Sheltie has accepted her.
I forgot to mention the sadness in Micah and Cooper over the loss of Daniel, they wouldn't lay next to me where he used to or play with any of his toys, this went on for about 2 weeks. Micah especially missed Daniel. They both comforted me and I comforted them.
It is interesting how quickly life can change and the dynamics of a household. I believe God jump started me with seeing the puppies online, it is hard to be so deeply in grief at the same time new life bursts into your life.
I prayed to God that just once somehow I would be blessed with something that would reassure me that Daniel was not lost forever and that he was okay. I think my prayers were answered in a very unusual way and this is how it went.
I collected the many dog toys from the yard that Daniel had and I took them downstairs to wash them. The next day I noted on the sidewalk in my fenced in yard there was one just laying right in my path. I decided I would come back and get that one later and take it and wash it.
The third day at night I went out to the barn to throw hay to the horses, there were kittens running around as usual and I wasn't looking down when I walked in. On the way back up the row of stalls I was heading back to feed the barn cats and I was looking down, right in the middle of the aisle way was Daniels toy. It had traveled from just outside the patio doors through the yard, a gate and down the driveway.
I never take the dogs to the barn, I never take dog toys to the barn and cats don't carry dog toys. I thought my brother might have brought it to the barn so I went in the house and woke him up, the answer was no. There had never been a dog toy in the barn period.
The day that Daniel passed I collapsed on the couch with my other dogs and screamed and cried, I wanted to die and I wanted to be where Daniel was at too, my prayer was very serious and I meant it. The only thing other than asking God to take me to and then realizing I had all of my other animals that needed me to was to ask God for one special thing.
My spiritual friend and I mean a powerful person in prayer text me a prayer later that evening, she never knows what or how the prayer will go till she begins to write it and I cried when I read it. My friend had almost word for word prayed for what I had ask God for. So we waited and what came was the mysterious dog toy.
At first I did not believe it was what I thought it was and I was emotionally numb by the third day but over the next few days I allowed myself to be comforted by the strange thing that had happened.
I miss Daniel so and I know I will never not miss him, I am so deeply connected to him and his loving heart but I am able to cope with it now. I will never have another Golden Retriever, I could not bare it but another puppy was soon in my future.
My other 2 dogs are getting old and I have always wanted a female Sheltie. During the week of Thanksgiving I happened to jump on my computer early one morning and as soon as my facebook page loaded there was a picture of a large litter of Shelties at a rescue, all females. I fought the urge because I didn't think now was a good time and spring would be better but Sheltie puppies at a rescue is rare. I talked myself into at least going and looking, it was a two hour drive.
I walked into the room with the puppies and suddenly became engulfed in puppy love and just plain puppiness. I sat down and watched each one, they tackled me with kisses. The smallest one however took her time and slowly approached me after a minute or so and licked my hand. My daughter picked her up and held her and she was quiet and looked around thoughtfully.
She was the smallest and I took her home. Her name is Elsa, she is very good and also now full of life and although she is sweet she is much more bold. The cat Mia who was almost dead when my daughter dropped her off in my barn and I nursed her back to life is Elsa's partner in crime and they run and play.
My Micah who has always been overbearing and grumpy is now the number one puppy babysitter, after about a week he came around to playing with her. Cooper my old Sheltie has accepted her.
I forgot to mention the sadness in Micah and Cooper over the loss of Daniel, they wouldn't lay next to me where he used to or play with any of his toys, this went on for about 2 weeks. Micah especially missed Daniel. They both comforted me and I comforted them.
It is interesting how quickly life can change and the dynamics of a household. I believe God jump started me with seeing the puppies online, it is hard to be so deeply in grief at the same time new life bursts into your life.
