Micah enjoys my pillow and blanket..... he's a bed hog

I work from home now and my bedroom is catercorner to my office. Daniel is always true blue and sleeps by my feet as I work. Other dogs sleep in my bed and are still able to watch me.

Micah decided to take a nice nap this morning while I worked. I thought it was cute to take a picture and as you can see by the big yawn, he wasn't disturbed enough to get up.

Micah is always the first one to get in bed at night and plants himself on my pillow waiting for a snuggle.

Curse the dang rain

Not much more to say than it's a soggy mess outside, back on with the horses coats and waiting for another warm day to come, sometime...;. next year maybe. 

Thanks Lord for a beautiful day

The weather is so wonderful today. Kylie and I went to the barn and took the horse blankets off and ran the horses around a little, we also built Cody's stall up because it had a bad dip. Traci the owner and I pitched in together and filled wheel barrows with gravel and put the mats on top.

Cody has a nice stall right next to the sliding door and he likes to watch outside and especially when the kids are playing. There's chickens, and ducks and geese. Some cows and mini's, barn cats, and a couple of dogs. What fun.

We came home and made dinner and then we played outside with the dogs and walked the little ponies out into the field which someday will be a swell pasture.

It's a little muddy but not bad and the breeze was warm and fresh. This will be the first spring in this home. I have to figure out what to do about the sunroom and the birds, it is a nice place for them but I hate the idea of taking Nana's big cage apart again and moving it.

The garage is the last thing to clean up from the move, the hay and the wood. One of these nice days coming I'll open all three doors and clean it up good. Kylie wants a work table out there so she'll have to help clean it and organize it.

We live in alpaca country now, they are cute and tempting. I think outside of horses though I'd like to have a couple of miniature donkey's. I love the little things, so much personality. But I know the worst thing to do is bring more animals home, I love them all but the other's suffer when there are too many. I hope though someday we can find a pony cart for pony and Kylie, before she gets too old to make those kinds of memories,

Yes today was indeed good, the long and gray months gone soon I hope. Of course there are always the hot months, I hate those too but the evenings are nice and it's always windy here. Tomorrow is work but I'm not stressed about it. The sun shines into the window in my office and the view is nice. I have total peace and quiet to concentrate and my co-workers and I instant message all the time. The dogs of course have to surround my chair like covered wagons but they are a comfort.

Nana is totally spoiled now because she eats breakfast with me and is right beside the refrigerator. Nothing gets past that bird.

Here's to the warmer weather, may it last awhile. 

A splendid day

I let the little ponies out this morning, they are still wearing their coats but soon they won't have to. I worked my job and put macaroni and cheese in the oven, it was good. After work I shot down to the barn to help with stalls and chores. The sun was shining beautifully.

I helped with the stalls which were simple, played with Aubrey and Cody and fed them carrots. No drama, no dealing with obsessive boarders being completely out of line and neurotic, The place we board the two horses is owned by a nice family that does things very similar to the way we used to at our barn and they have the equipment to make the job easier. 

It's easy to work along side of people who kind of are in sync with your thoughts and ways. I gained an education working with and caring for horses and learned about them and about people too.

I learned what true friendship is and what it is not. I learned that sometimes a horses worst enemy is it's owner. I also learned a great deal from caring for dogs, all kinds of dogs, some with issues and some without. The owner's of dogs I believe are more sensible.

I learned that people that love animals often hate people and will use people and abuse them and wonder why the people in the world are so terrible. Really, to change the world you need to learn to love people and show them kindness even if they spit in your face if you can, ultimately, helping people helps animals. The tough part is that animals will accept the help and give in return, people aren't so evolved or gracious so it takes a better person to be kind to another person than to be kind to animals.

I've learned from my experiences with animals how to love and sacrifice, and to respect their goodness and pureness of heart. I've learned from their owner's to be kind and generous for my own sake and learn to know when to draw the line sometimes. I lost some human friends a long the way but I retained the ones who counted. I made a lot of animal friends though, I never lost any of them except to the good Lord. I have a treasure trove of dog and horse friends in my heart.

I recall the St. Bernard Ben who I went to get with a trainer that worked for a rescue. He was aggressive but very ill, so ill in fact that he couldn't even be vaccinated for a month he was so weak. Ben was only two years old and would have died had we not went and got him. Ben for some strange reason trusted me, he was very aggressive and protective of his family who couldn't care for him anymore. Ben could have bit me and I would have really been hurt but he didn't. Ben has a great home now and all his medical needs have been taken care of.

That's just one story and there are others. I made mistakes a long the way of course and went through some bad times but I don't regret the two years I got my education, of course I could have done without some of the people difficulties, I can say I've experienced shallow people up close and personal.

Now is the season to stop and enjoy my animals my close friends and my daughter. I took a shower when I got home from the barn, I'll watch some TV. It almost seems like a normal life. Yes, today was splendid, I hope to have more days like this.

A nice visit from an old friend

Today it was work and a little house cleaning. An old friend stopped by this evening and it was a nice visit. She hadn't seen the house before and it was nice to show her around. We will be dog sitting for her for a week. My friend's dog is a girl and my four boys were all sweet gentlemen.

It was nice to have dinner here with a friend and an animal lover. Nana our parrot had to have pizza too and she was throwing a fit because she had to wait till our guest arrived to have some. Nana always knows when the food is ready and she has zero patience.

We had the fire going, the dogs got crust and Nana had her two pieces of crust and she finally settled down till she didn't like the fact that the sun had gone down and the lights where her cage is were still on. Nana is a high maintenance pet.

Afterwards, Kylie and I went to town to get rabbit food. The bunnies were throwing a fit too because they hadn't had dinner.

Now it's cold and snowing again, I am tired of the cold gray days, it seems like this is the longest winter I can remember. Gray melting into gray days on end, months. It's hard to be motivated to do anything this time of year.

I am hoping the spring is not to wet so that they hay will come on soon and prices will drop. It would be nice to be outside and not have to deal with mud everywhere.

Daylight savings is coming up and I will be happy to see the longer nights too. I keep reminding myself it will all be over in a month or so. I will attempt to have a small garden this year and hope to plant some roses.

I am tired of buying propane and firewood as well, lots of money and picking up and stacking wood. This summer I will stock up on wood and get the garage organized and we will be ready for winter.

Still, it's cold and damp and I am sleepy. I am learning to relax and pace myself more living here. I still miss the barn but being out from under so much stress is good, I still have a lot of debts to payoff but there's food on the table and Kylie and the animals don't have to suffer.

I hate not having Cody home but I know he's well taken care of and when I go see him I am spending time with him instead of working so hard at barn chores. There's time for me too, I am not good at taking care of myself, I am getting enough sleep now and eating better which is all good.

Kylie sometimes studies in my office here while I am doing my work and the dogs are all with me too. Life is funny, I didn't think I would survive last year and I still feel traumatized but here I am safe and am trying to break the habit of worry.

I am grateful for God's blessings, so many people don't believe anymore but God is real and He cares. Over the years all there has been sometimes is God, I know from experience His goodness. It's not because a person does great things or is particularly good. The bible says the sun shines on the good and the evil alike and that God will have mercy on who He pleases. I just know He's here with me always and it is as it pleases Him. His presence in my life pleases me. The older I get the more He is, I feel like He asks me is He enough, and I say yes Lord you are and looking around me it is true He has been enough for I am well cared for.

I sometimes question God on why he doesn't heal my biological family. It saddens me to think that they are so lost with drugs, alcohol, and mental illness. They also have strong metaphysical beliefs that they seem to think gives them control over their environment. It seems like a way to cope with life without relying on someone else, only what you believe you can do with metaphysical tools. I am not going to judge from a Christian standpoint and it being sin it's just that we as humans are limited. I am aware of the spiritual world and how it works and warfare but I am not afraid to give up control and believe in the power of God. I can turn it all over to him and say Father here it is, guide me and protect me.

I pray for my family and God to be with them in the best way He sees fit. I don't know if they would ever be healed and if they did that they would recognize God but they have my prayers and God has my faith, He sees what I cannot see and understands what I cannot know, perhaps that's best.

About this time at night, maybe a little earlier, the house is more quiet. The dogs have given up wondering where I might go next in the house, they all huddle and go to sleep, it's their bedtime. Nana is in her cage under a blanket at her highest perch getting her beauty rest, she loves to watch the sunrise and so she goes to bed early.

The other birds are sleeping too and I am ready to go to bed. A peaceful place that I will have to grasp my pillow and blanket quickly before a dog lands on them. The only noise will be dogs breaths in slumber and the room will be warm and cozy. These are the riches of my life.

Teetering on the edge

For awhile now I've been inwardly debating about changing certain habits that give me grief. It could be because I am friends with so many animal lovers on Facebook and of course some of my own conviction. The problem is slaughter and the excessive amounts of meat I believe we all eat.

As I get older I just hate thinking of the magnitude of animals slaughtered for food. What is even more a disgrace is the amount of food that is wasted in this country. Meat is as convenient as potato chips basically and taken for granted. You can have meat any time and you can just throw out what you don't eat. My problem with this is that a living creature lost it's life to feed people and it's life was taken for food and then is just thrown away.

Not so long ago you didn't eat meat unless you had the nerve to kill the animal yourself, seems just going to the store and buying meat divorces us from conscience what so ever.

As a meat eater which I may not be for much longer, I feel that if I tried eating other sources of food and only ate meat once a week and more fish etc. I'd be less of a consumer and maybe if everyone did that there would be less slaughter.

As an animal lover and having met domestic animals like cows, chickens and pigs I just know that they have feelings, that they have souls. I pray to God about it and I wish the world wasn't so cruel. That we as humans were more responsible for God's creatures and for the people that know real hunger. I pray that when someone thinks about wasting any type of food that think about others who are less fortunate, children and people that would be thankful for what we throw away.

This has been bothering me for awhile, I don't have all the answers but as I search my own heart I feel I need to do something. 

Sorrow... touches me again

Today I learned through a friend that one of my beloved horses passed away. William who had been abused and was a terrible cribber passed with colic. I am grieving, I'm so sad and I had no where else to share my grief except to blog.

I grieve for the memory of standing in the midst of a small herd of horses almost every day. They all are woven into the fabric of my heart. I watched Will so closely to make sure he didn't crib and avoided colic. It's tragic to me to hear he is gone. Will never got the deep love he craved, people didn't understand him and he didn't trust people.

His owner loved him I know but when you board horses there is so much you can't control. When they are home or you are with them almost all of the time you can do more to prevent things sometimes.

My precious Mare Girl, Polo, Rauls, Satire, and William who was still young have all went away. It's hard to think about, they all touched my life in special ways. I haven't forgotten them or the others that allowed me to be apart of their lives and hearts.

I am saying a prayer for William tonight and the others. No matter how far away or how my life has changed they will always be a part of it.

My horses are doing well since we moved them to a nice little farm and I have made a change in my employment which allows me to work from home. Kylie needed me and it gives some time to be with Cody and the other animals without killing myself with such a long commute.

I know that I am very blessed to have survived and been able to keep my animals and provide a home for my daughter, but my heart gets restless with memories of the ones I left behind. I would have suffered anything to be able to care for them. Life is funny and perhaps God thought better for me, perhaps He thought it was time for me to be better taken care of. I don't know except to trust Him and allow Him to wipe away the tears in my heart for William.